i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
