week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
