This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
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Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
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I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives