Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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