Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize