Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
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