So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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