I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
