He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
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Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
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I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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