I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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