I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize