Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
He kissed a someone with a penis
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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