you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
