forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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