I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
we're making bets on your personal life
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize