Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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