She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
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