Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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