new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
