I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
