All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
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