the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
PANTIES FOUND
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