I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
