found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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