My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
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