this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
