just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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