do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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