Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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