I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
