I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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