Me too!
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
