My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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