East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
