She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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