More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
