well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
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