we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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