remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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