i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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