You're so nebulous sometimes
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
