You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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