So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize