Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
NoShamevember. You game?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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