Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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