I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
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he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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