Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
