no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
