Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
porn star boner night. come get it.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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