I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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